This Time Imperfect - AFI

I cannot leave here. I cannot stay.

Forever hunted, more than afraid.

Asphyxiate on words I would say.

I'm drawn to a blackened sky as I turn blue.

There are no flowers, no, not this time.

There will be no angles gracing the lines, just these stark words i find.

I'd show a smile but im too weak.

I'd share with you, could i only speak, just how much this hurts me.

I cannot stay here. I cannot leave.

Just like all i loved, I'm make believe.

Imagined heart, I disappear.

Seems no one will appear here and make me real.

I'll tell you how it haunts me...

Cuts through my day and sinks into my dreams

You don't care that it haunts me

---------------------------------------------------------------------

one of my fav songs from afi...enjoy!

it's 2.39am now and im still up. today's my graduation ceremony...cant wait for dat! yesterday was moi bufday..happy belated bufday to me! got a very cute, adorable pressie frm mum, sis n bro..and a very pretty, yummylicious tree frm me dearest bestfren, syaf! also my uncle frm england managed to sent me a bufday card right on the day itself! thank u sooooooooooo much guys for the presents! i really love! love! love! it! and thanks to everyone who wished me! :D speaking of wishes, i received an unexpected bufday greeting frm a certain someone whom i never heard frm for a very long time. i never received bufday wishes from him for the past 7 years that we've known each other...till recently...hmm..i guess being 21 is an important ordeal in everyone's life..nonetheless thank you!

well...had a pretty gd weekend last sunday...went to Bukit Timah to hike wif syaf and her parents...it was great! love it! (cant wait for the cycling trip to ubin dis coming june!) we went to Botanic garden soon after dat (for lunch) and i have to say, the place is b.e.a.u.t.i.f.u.l! its been a loooong time since ive last went there...so much has changed! its a nice, peaceful place fill with colourful flowers and beatiful landscape. i love it there! a nice place to relax and chill...hey buddy..lemme knoe if you're going there again aite! ;)

man oh man...its 3am now...time for me to hit the sack! will write again wen im in the mood...till then adios!

ahhh...isnt it nostalgic to listen back to all those casette tapes which are full of old songs that you've recorded while doing your homework during your precious secondary school days...rite now im listening to my special angel by....??? sori cant recall whose the singer was...but its a very pleasant song...calm and sweeet...

oh hey hey hey! what do ya knoe...ac milan kick manU arse!! weeeeeeee! eat that you manU fans!! what i tell ya...ac will def win! 5-3 baby!! so now...the finals...ac milan vs liverpool...oooo...me against me bro...tis will be interesting...should i go over to my bro's house and watch it with him? hmmm....im considering...BUT it'll prob be in the early morn...i dun wanna sleep over there...haizzzz...troublesome if one do not have sports channel...dammit! oh well..i'll think over it...

my prediction? duh! of course ac WILL win! they better!! with kaka, pirlo, maldini, nesta, lil gattuso...they're unstoppable! though liverpool fans will def disagree with me...wth! oh well...i'll stop here for now...ciao!

1stly...FORZA NERAZZURRI!!! my Inter Milan has officially won the Scudetto...though there's still a couple of matches left...they truly deserved it!

2ndly...damn dat ManU!! and damn dat AC Milan for not holding their ground to obtain a draw! i was really hoping dat AC will trash ManU for gd...BUT...AC could not deliver the result! well cant really blame them...what with lil Gattuso being injured halfway through the match...man...how i wish i could watch that match!! i sooooooo really wanna watch it! hopefully AC will be able to trash ManU in this coming 2nd leg and they'll show the finals at channel 5!

ok peeps..i'll stop here...midnite mania starting...toodles!

Don't ya just love beetlejuice...micheal keaton if im not mistaken..and winona ryder...luv the movie...

it seems that disasters and tragedies will never seize to end...tsunami...hurricanes...earthquake...and now...just a few days ago a brutal tragedy has befallen the folks in Virginia...the massacre of over 3o students in Virginia Tech University...wats worst is that the killer was Asian! my god! how sick and psycho can u be to kill ur own fellow students just coz u dun fit in well in that school. it really gives me the creeps thinking about how the killer plan out his execution...locking the doors...trapping students inside the building...entered the classroom, pulled the trigger and fired aimlessly at the students...heesh! it's like hollywood movie comes to live. freaking gruesome!

though i know not a single soul there but i offer my deepest condolences to all of the students in Virginia Tech University who are deeply affected by this nasty massacre.

work start at 9am today...ends at 4pm...the day went by quite dully...the newpaper and storybook were my only companion...speaking of storybook...i've just bought myself a new book!

after such a looooooong time of book drought, i've finally purchased a new book which i've wanted for the past few mnths! well i saw this book Dark Demon by Christine Feehan a few mnths back at Page One - Vivocity, but i didnt bought it...coz basically i was broke. then last tuesday, i finally get my hands on that book! boy oh boy! the book is great!

aite...back to 2day's story...after work..went to NUH to visit me grandma..she just had her operation yesterday and she's doing fine now :)...anyway as i sat next to her, i saw a black helmet and a pair of gloves on her bed. asked her who it belongs to and she told me that it belongs to my dearest cousin whom i had not seen for many years! hearing his name i was sooooo darn excited to see him! i've not seen him for like wat...7-8 yrs??? me and him used to be close when i was a kid..so close that he's like an older brother to me...we used to play together all the time...but when i was like 12 or so n him 18..he suddenly disappeared...just like that...heard the news from his mom that he's been offered a good job and went overseas. later i learnt that he's a diver and does engineering stuff underneath the sea...pretty neat huh...i was really really happy to see him after all these years...he looks pretty much the same..if not taller...we chatted...catch up on things...he's leaving tomorro for Sarawak..dunno when he'll be back...hey cuz! wish ya all the best! come back home soon aite!

im back! rite! after such a long hiatus i've decided to update me blog...not that much ppl is readin this particular blog (which suits me fine)...anyway...it's 1.28am here...been working my butts off these past 6 days (well...sitting down, ticking names aint that tiresome...but the long journey is damn exhausting!) and finally today is my dayoff ! i've no complaints bout my temp job..the pay is darn gd! and the view is quite entertaining too ;p

anyway...the reason i'm working right now is not coz im on school holiday...no no no...as of right now...me...mua...have officially graduated from Temasek Polytechnic with a Diploma of Internet Computing! congrats to me! still couldnt believe it though...seems surreal to me..oh and congrats to my girl pals (Ira, Ima, Dira...we did it girls!!)

life's been quite...well...i wouldnt say hectic coz all i did was rot at home for the most part before obtaining this p/t job...been slowly serveying the job options that are available on the net...and i did applied for some...no news yet...sigh...will search for more later in the afternoon...as for now think i'll hit the sack...was thinking of getting up at 4.30am...for wat? no not soccer (wish i still have my sports channel..haizzz) well im like soooooo addicted with the movie Pride and Prejudice. ever since i watched it last week i cant stop watching it! thanx syaf for lending me the dvd! ure the best! ;) im so intrigued by Mr Darcy...such a charming man! and i love to hear their old-british accent...and also the way they greet each other...women will curtsy towards the men while men...or rather gentlemen will bow down towards the women...

those old days were full of gentlemen...do i considered men now to be gentlemen? no way! most men now cant even be trusted! most men are 2-faced...they'll be all sweet and loving and caring in the beginning...but once ure married...thats it. they'll show you their true colours...and when they're sick of you...they're find someone else...chuck you at the side and leave you...

ok ok..i'll better stop here before i ramble on...will update again when im in the mood.

ps: im soooo dissapointed with Roma! why the hell did they let that freaking manU defeated them 7-1 (agg 8-3)??? why Roma?? why?? milan better knock manU out of champions league!!

pss: (to a certain someone) im sorry if ive hurt or caused you pain...didnt mean to...ure a good friend and i hope this will not affect our friendship.

time check: 12.44am
mood: sleepy/bored

since there's 2 ppl now who have tagged me (dunno y) and since im bloody bored mite as well i ans these qns......rite here goes.......

Where do you live? Singapore
Latest addiction? Samurai X..luuurvee dat anime!
Song that you're listening right now? AFI latest album: DecemberUnderground..kickass man!
What are you doing right now? doing this stupid tag
Who was the last person you went out to eat with? dearest mother, brother and aunt
If you were a toy, what would you be? i wanna be a barbie doll! sooooooo pweeety!
Where would you want to go on your honeymoon? Venice!! oh wait..Milan-San Siro Stadium! no no..Paris!!!
What's your ringtone? All That I've Got - The Used
What do you think a toblerone is? chocolate...duh!
What are you wearing right now? tp orientaion t-shirt and shorts..my pajamas! comfy comfy!
Do you wear contacts? yep..not now though
What was the best advice ever given to you? hmmm..perhaps 'patience is a virtue' by my gd ol fren
Can you drive? no..quite learning halfway..(idiot!)
What are your plans? after this? hmm..watch samurai x..den sleep..
Favourite Film? it has to be LOTR w/o a doubt
Do you like to dance? not really..i cant even dance if my life depends on it!
Are you too shy to ask anyone out? YES..way..way..WAY SHY
Worst feeling in the world? losing the ppl whom i love..seriously..thats the worst feelings a person cud ever feel!
Worst sound? the ringing of telephone in the middle of the nite while ur sleeping
What's the first thing you do when you wake up? think wat shud i do today..which always leads to the normal routine..housework..tv..yada yada yada...
Roller coaster, scary or exciting? e.x.c.i.t.i.n.g.
How many times do you let the phone ring before you answer it? how the hell shud i knoe..geez who counts them!
Is the glass half full or half empty? isnt that the same meaning??....wateva
Your best physical feature? hmmm...my eyes?? i dunno!
Milk or white chocolate? both r nice..but can i choose dark chocs? hmm..yummmmy!!!
Day or Night? nite
Summer or winter? hmm..i havent experience winter b4..but i heard that winter is a pretty bleak season..so i would go for summer
Cake or pie? both r yummylicious!
Diamonds or pearls? diamonds
Sunrise or sunset? both are beautiful
Have you ever broken a bone? err...dun think so..
You hate people who are? hypocrite..backstabber..liar(i loath liars!)
Do you believe in fighting? yes..fight for wat u believe in!
What skill do you wish you had? to have all the necessary skills which can help me get a gd job which i love to be in!
Where are your favourite places? in my room..on my comfy comfy bed with the air-con switch on..like rite now! ahh..wat a blisss....
Who sent you last sms? me dearest brother
Last sms you sent to? same..me bro
Last person you talked on the phone? me bro
Last Person whom you chatted with last night? aiyo..memory short-term..cant remember
Last photos you took with friends? 4 days ago..at Pacific Plaza..in the toilet..go figure!
any plans of going out? as in 2moro? no...monday? yes!
What would you do after answering this bulletin? watch me fav anime! samurai x! Hittokiri Battousai!! Kenshin Himura the Manslayer! kk..im off now...ciao!!

FORZA AZZURRI!!! FORZA ITALIA!!!
World Cup Germany 2006 Champion goes to............................ITALY!!!!!!!!!!

AT LAST!!! Italy has won the FIFA World Cup Germany 2006!!! About time guys! Im really..truly..estatic when Italy won the world cup. it's their 4th time winnning the trophy(1 trophy less than Brazil) and they truly deserve it.

ok ok..i know im not Italian nor do i live there but that doesnt mean i cant be drunk with happiness..i've been watching Italian serie A for the past 3 years(well when i used to have cable sports channel that is..) and naturally, when it comes to this world cup..the only team im rooting for is none other than the AZZURRI.

im abit worried though of how this italian team would perform..what with all those scandals back home..but im very pleased to see them play well..they've kept on improving match after match and my favourites match to watch are when Italy play against Germany. man that was one hell of a game. the Azzurri were superb! they kept on attacking during the 1st half..(though they did play lotsa defence during the 2nd half of the match) but you can c them lashing out at Germany during the extra time and those last min 2 goals were sooo brilliant and breathtaking!! Andrea Pirlo..one of my fav players..was damn brilliant and it's coz of him that Grosso found the net..killing Germany's chances of goin thru the finals. Del Piero crash all German's hope by scoring that 2nd goal and Italy's were thru to Berlin! BERLIN BERLIN HERE WE COME!! (luv dat phrase)

FINALS: ITALY VS FRANCE
it's been worth my time waking up at 1.30am..watching the finals. honestly..i've been very nervous and anxious while watching that game and my heart almost stop when the ref gave france the penalty..Zidane's penalty kick was a real teaser..kick the ball..hit the post..enter the net and bounce back..urgh! luckily Materazzi gave Italy the equaliser..again thanx to the fabulous Pirlo's corner kick! i have to admit France seems more aggressive and stronger and Italy kept on defending their fortress..making a few attack here and there..it's a pity Zidane lose his nerve and head-butted Materazzi..he was awarded a red card for that..poor Zizou..

anyway..those last penalty kept me wide awake..it was nervewrecking watching them taking those penalties and Buffon, the world-class goalkeeper, could not even stop a single goal..LUCKILY Trezeguet missed the chances of scoring and once Grosso kick that last ball into the net, i almost leap out and screamed silently(it was at 5am in the morn!)! Out of pure joy! Pure happiness! you can clearly c how tense their captain(Cannavaro) is when his team-mates each took a penalty..Pirlo was hugging Cannavaro and with each goal..Canna did not move..did not celebrate unlike the rest of his team mates..that wasnt until Grosso finally found the net that Canna leapt out and ran around the pitch!

Well done guys! well done! Finally they've silence all those critics by winning the world cup! their 4th World Cup! everyone..each individual in the team should be congratulated but to me..the most excellent players in the team have been Fabio Cannavaro and Andrea Pirlo! My two fav players in Italy!

It's been a really fun time watching this 2006 World Cup! hopefully Italy can continue this success in the upcoming tournament! i wonder who will then be captain after Cannavaro's retire..hmm...guess we'll have to find out later. till then....ciao!!

mood: chill (abit annoyed wif the comp speed)

listening to Lostprophets latest songs from mtvasia..am definately buying that cd..awesome songs! check them out if u havent heard of them..speaking of cd..i've list out tons of cds which i need to get my hands on..some of which are COMPULSARY to buy:

Taking Back Sunday
AFI
The Academy Is..
Avenged Sevenfold
Head Automatica
HIM
From First To Last
Lacuna Coil

yea yea..i knoe some of these cds are released a few years back but hey..i just discovered them..thanx to my extra time at work surfing around finding gd bands that are worth listening to while killing time or doing my work..

haizz..lookin at all those cds make me wish that i have some extra $$ to burn..soo many cds so little $$..wateva..i'll make sure i'll get those cds eventually..

World Cup fever is on! yeeesssssaaaaa! been trying my best to watch some of those matches live..unfort..most of the gd match starts at 3am! if only im having my term break now..wateva..at least i get to watch most of Italy's game. FORZA AZZURRI!

though i support the Azzurri, however im quite disappointed with the team. granted they have a massive problem back home but come on! they need to put all their problems behind and just concentrate on each game. they have not played well and the last match against the Socceroos was atrocious! they win out of pure LUCK. the referee was blind enuf to award the italians with a penalty after Grosso was apparently 'brought' down by one of the ozzy's player. but wen u look at the replay closely..it was actually Grosso who fell down by himself..wateva..the italians were really lucky.

i didnt watch how they played against Ghana but acc to all the news and report i've read it seems that they played well. im hoping that they'll show the same enthusiasm and skill level as they did with Ghana against Ukraine 2moro morn..they HAVE to WIN!

Whew! wat a long passage..anyways..i'll stop here for now..i'll write more wen i feel like it..soooo in the meantime adios peeps!

it's been quite some time since i'v last wrote in..honestly im too lazy to update this blog..but for the past few weeks, something has been bothering me..or rather my mind..

it seems that the world is ending. too much destruction and killing is happening now. when u read the newspaper or even watch the news everyday, there'll be at least one news regarding ppl dying (either from diseases, murdered or perished due to natural disasters)..it seems that our population kept on decreasing and decreasing wif the amnts of death happening everyday..and in vast amnt mind u..i wonder when will all these tragedy and killings will end..only god knows.

nxt off..im really disgusted..i repeat..DISGUSTED when i read the news about ppl raping their own flesh and blood! i mean how sick can u be?? these ppl r wat i call animals..no BEASTS! they should not go to jail..jail sentences are too lenient..24 strokes of cane are still not enough..they should be tied..and hot stones, directly from fire should be thrown at them till they DIE!! DIE U ASSHOLES N BURN IN HELL!! now THOSE ppl we should get rid off..not the innocents..

i weep..silent tears fall down in the middle of the night
i weep..out of pure misery
i weep..letting out the pure frustration out of my aching heart
i weep..feeling guilty as i have never feel before
i weep..as i welcome the darkness surround
i weep..and weep..and weep..
and weep for my fucking confusing soul!

Ghost Of You - My Chemical Romance

I never said i'd lie in wait forever
If I died we'd be together
I can't always just forget her
But she could try

At the end of the world
Or the last thing I see
You are
Never coming home
Never coming home
Could I? Should I?
And all the things that you never ever told me
And all the smiles that are ever ever..

Ever..Get the feeling that you're never
All alone and I remember now
At the top of my lungs in my arms she dies
She dies

At the end of the world
Or the last thing I see
You are
Never coming home
Never coming home
Could I? Should I?
And all the things that you never ever told me
And all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me
Never coming home Never coming home
Could I? Should I?
And all the wounds that are ever gonna scar me
For all the ghosts that are never gonna catch me

If I fall
If I fall (down)

well..wat can i say..i just L.O.V.E this band! they totally rock man! /m\ the album Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge is bloody good i tell ya..go get it!! it's worth your money! ;) oh yeah..check out the vidz to this song..it's fucking awesome!! too bad someone had to die in that vidz..heh..

Everything You Want - Vertical Horizon

Somewhere there's speaking
It's already coming in
Oh and it's rising at the back of your mind
You never could get it
Unless you were fed it
Now you're here and you don't know why

But under skinned knees and the skid marks
Past the places where you used to learn
You howl and listen
Listen and wait for the
Echoes of angels who won't return

He's everything you want
He's everything you need
He's everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
He says all the right things
At exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you
And you don't know why

You're waiting for someone
To put you together
You're waiting for someone to push you away
There's always another wound to discover
There's always something more you wish he'd say

But you'll just tight
And watch it unwind
It's only what you're asking for
And you'll be just fine
With all of your time
It's only what you're waiting for

Out of the island
Into the highway
Past the places where you might have turned
You never did notice
But you still hide away
The anger of angels who won't return

waking up early in the morning, we're supposed to feel fresh and start a day with a smile..but wen i woke up this morning and after taking my early breakfast(fasting month now), i felt sad. y? coz rite on the front cover of the newspaper, there's a picture of ppl, carrying dead bodies.

another hugh earthquake had occured in india and pakistan..kashmir if im not mistaken. thousands ppl are dead and i think another thousands, cud be close to a million lost their homes. another tragedy has yet again strike another country. wat is more pitiful is that most of these ppl are poor. a victim is quoted of saying "yesterday, we have homes to live in but now, our homes are gone" isnt that heart wrenching? im glad that many countries take immediate actions to help these countries out. counrties are uniting together to provide help and medical aid to these unfortunate countries.

with all these tragedies happening to the world nowadays, one should take a step back and think about wat has happened. everything u own and have could be taken away just like that..without any warning. so appriciate wat u have and always try and help others who's in need.

let us all pray that all these natural disaster will stop and that we can all live peacefully togther like we used to.

well, most girls will go crazy wen they saw pics of prince william or prince harry on the newspaper or magazine. i wonder how they'll react if they see prince andrea and prince pierre's pics..to me..these prince of Monaco are way..way better looking than william and harry. dun believe me..just search for Andrea and Pierre Casiraghi's pics. they're hot man! (swoon!) hahaha ;>

disappointed..sad..numb..imagine having all those feelings at the same time.

disappointed. wif who? someone close to you. whom u know for a long time. y? coz he/she let u down. u expect them to be this way but as it turn out, they're different then who u think they are.

sad. y? coz one of ur family member are sick. just seeing them being sick and ill makes ur heart sore..it makes u depress not being able to help them. but i guess all u can do is pray. pray everyday that this person will get better. never give up hope.

numb. y numb? well wen u're feeling damn tired and ur brain cud not function plus u receive bad news that u did not ecxpect..well basically ur whole emotions and feelings grew cold and numb. u feel nothing. neither sad nor angry. ur like a walking zombie/robot. u cant let the tears of frustration out from ur eyes..it's frozen..refuse to fall..

wtf! this conclude tonite's entry. gdnite folks.

Katrina..Rita..Nabi..hmmm..wat else? well cant remember the rest but these r the famouse name which we often heard nowadays. wat am i talking about? well unless ur an alien, im toking bout those hurricanes which are causing destruction and chaos in america and japan..just flip to any newspaper here and u can c articles about those hurricanes..sad but true..the world is ending..wen? only god knows. all we can do is to be prepared.

hmm..ramadhan's coming..a mnth full of perseverance to many stuff, not just eating and drinking...looking forward for this coming 2 mnths..

hmm..well running out of ideas of wat to write so guess this blog ends here tonite..adios

just love Billie's voice..his voice is really unique/nice..anyway..watching green days live performance now and as usual..it was greeaat! awesome! very energetic! too bad they didnt perform When I Come Around and Time of Your Life(those are my ol time favs!) anyway..just wanna publish this lyrics by GC..njoy..

The World Is Black - Good Charlotte

Turn on channel seven at a quarter to eight
You see the same damn thing it's just a different day and
No one really knows why this is happening
But it's happening
And everywhere you go it's just a different place
You get the same dark feeling
See the same sad faces
No one really cares that this is happening

We come into this world
And we all are the same
In that moment there's no one to blame

But the world is black
And hearts are cold
And there's no hope
That's what we're told
And we can't go back
It won't be the same
Forever changed
By the things we've seen, seen

Living in this place it's always been this way
There's no one doing nothing so there's nothing changed
And I can't live when this world just keeps dying
It's dying
People always tell me this is part of the plan
That God's got everybody in His hands
But I can only pray that God is listening
Is He listening?

We're living in this world
Growing colder everyday
Nothing can stay perfect now I see

ps: gd luck for the results girls!!

Top news: J.D. FORTUNE has finally prove himself worthy to lead inxs in their upcoming tour.

yessss! J.D. has won the competition! wohhoooooo! well..i was hoping Marty will win it but then i can c y inxs chose J.D. he's more involved wif the band..i mean while performing, he will like interact wif the band while Marty, well he'll just do his own stuff, entertaining the crowd wherelse there is less chemistry on stage wif the band..(well that's my opinion anyway) MiG Ayeeeesaaaa...haha..i like the sound of that..MiG Ayesa..well i think he knows the outcome wen inxs were to eliminate one out of the 3..i can c it on his face..slightly dejected..oh well..its nice to c jordis and sweet suzie mcneil on stage again..haha 'sweeeet suzie mcneil' dave loves to call her that..and he did call her that again wen brooke introduce each contestants once again on stage..

oh yeah..talking about the stage..im really..truly..madly..in love with the house band lead guitarist!!! wohoooooo! he rocks man!! the way he plays the guitar..my goodness! it was bloody A.W.E.S.O.M.E!! haha..kk..i know i use that word lots of time here but oh well..who cares..that guy is just amazing! i get goosebumps when i hear the sound of that guitar..electric guitar mind u..he plays his ass out! i was totally blown away!(k im overreacting here..heh) but seriously..the whole house band ROCKS!! /m\ congrats to J.D. once again..he deserve it..

and well that conculdes tonite's entry..